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ME

<♥>

Hello, my name is Mylene.

Screams
Friday, January 11, 2013
So, one week since I've been here in Letterkenny. I had a pretty okay week so far. It wasn't the best, and it was far from enjoyable, but I made it out okay. Being in the hospital is a completely new experience, I'm not quite sure I like it yet. I'm not sure if I'm quite comfortable yet with change being the only constant. And maybe it's because I'm new, but I hate the feeling of redundancy that I get whenever I'm in there. Nobody lets me do anything, everybody knows what they're doing, and I'm left there standing in a corner, just watching and observing. I feel so irrelevant, and I don't know what to say or do. Getting grilled by the consultants does nothing for my self-esteem, and makes me wonder what the hell I've done with the past two and a half years in school. And up till today, I still struggle with the Irish accent, so I always have to ask the consultants to repeat their questions. Or I can't understand their questions, and I answer something irrelevant because I've misheard them. And sometimes I don't understand what the patients are saying, which is bad, especially when it comes to history taking. I'm having trouble trying to keep with everything that's going on, I don't know what I'm supposed to know, and I suffer from Meno's paradox all the time. The only upside to the past week is that I've actually really learned some stuffs. Seeing your textbooks come to life is really quite exciting, and I realize that I don't need to memorize in order to retain information anymore. Seeing it in real life makes the information stay somewhat more permanently.