ME
But anyway, like I said, I haven't been doing much. Aunty Christina came over on Tuesday and taught me how to make purple sweet potato mantous and also the choux pastry used to make cream puffs and eclairs. And today I made the mantous for my family to eat :) I think I didn't mix the dough enough, because my mantous came out with a kinda mottled color, lol. But they're still tasty :) so whatever, haha.
Jr's doing somewhat alright, he should be getting (or have already gotten) his parole answer soon, and I really hope and pray we get a good result! I want him out ASAP, being in there is NOT doing his health any good. But I think I'll have a lot more to worry about whenever he gets out. I worry so much about him, it's insane, I'm going to make him check in with me regularly once he's out to make sure he's safe and not in any trouble haha. I miss him a lot, I miss him all the time everyday, but I know that everyday that passes is one day closer to the day we're finally together. So I'm trying to really live the last few months of my life as a "single", before Jr comes out and I'll have to devote my time to him already. LOL, and by "single" I mean doing things that I like at my own time, spending time with my family and friends, not having to check in with anybody; in no way do I mean living the single life, partying and hooking up with guys! I'm fully committed to Jr already, I think I have been ever since he wrote his first letter to me.
As crazy as this may sound, I knew he was someone special from the first letter I got from him. Something just clicked within me, and then over the next few months I just started falling deeper and deeper in love with him. To someone who hasn't been through something like this before, it is VERY hard to comprehend just how you know you can love and fall in love with someone just via mail. It's utterly absurd to the 21st century mind, that you can court via snail mail; people just don't believe it's possible. With instant communication technology available at our hands and couples being able to communicate with each other all the time and almost instantly, it's very hard for people to take a courtship where you hear from each other at best once a week, and at worst, fortnightly. It's just incomprehensible, and I don't blame them at all. But I'm just tired of having to deal with the negativity, the disbelief, the skepticism that is constantly being thrown my way. I know I have to stay strong but it's not as easy as it seems.
One of the worst things about this whole situation is the inability to come clean with my family, the inability to tell them all of what is happening to me. I grew up being very close to my family and they practically know almost everything about me. But now, having to hide what is perhaps the largest part of my being is slowly killing me. This is supposed to be a piece of happy news but the circumstances under which all this occurred has made it entirely impossible for me to tell my parents the truth and expect their understanding and blessings of us. Recent talks with my mother have only served to reaffirm my fears. Like any parents out there, mine just want the best for me. They want me to live the best life that can possibly come my way. And where marriage is concerned, they hope that I'll marry the best available catch out there. My mother's always told me and my sister: He doesn't have to be rich, but he must be hardworking and in a good professional job, and able to earn a good living to support the both of you. And because no one they know has ever deviated from this 'path', they cannot see me walking any other paths as well. They always joke about my wedding, what it'll be like; they talk about it like it's the same as most of my other cousins and relatives. They talk about bringing him back to Melaka to see my relatives and cousins. And inside I don't know to break it to them that there's a chance Jr may never be able to leave USA, and even if he can, it'll be only after 2017, when he gets off parole.
This blog is really getting to be all about Jr, huh? Haha, I can't help it, he consumes almost all my thoughts. I can only take all this one step at a time. I really have no clue what to do now, or how to proceed in all this, only time will tell. I just really ask for God's favor in all this.
<♥>
Hello, my name is Mylene.
Screams
Monday, June 25, 2012
I haven't really been doing much since I last updated this blog. And speaking of this blog, I just noticed that I've got some VERY nice readers, who leave such lovely comments on my tag box. I actually have no clue who you people are, or if you are even real people (no offense, but someone told me he's gotten loads of automated spam comments on his tag box on his blog, so I can't be sure), but whatever it is, the comments are pretty sweet, so THANK YOU, to whoever you girls are :)But anyway, like I said, I haven't been doing much. Aunty Christina came over on Tuesday and taught me how to make purple sweet potato mantous and also the choux pastry used to make cream puffs and eclairs. And today I made the mantous for my family to eat :) I think I didn't mix the dough enough, because my mantous came out with a kinda mottled color, lol. But they're still tasty :) so whatever, haha.
Jr's doing somewhat alright, he should be getting (or have already gotten) his parole answer soon, and I really hope and pray we get a good result! I want him out ASAP, being in there is NOT doing his health any good. But I think I'll have a lot more to worry about whenever he gets out. I worry so much about him, it's insane, I'm going to make him check in with me regularly once he's out to make sure he's safe and not in any trouble haha. I miss him a lot, I miss him all the time everyday, but I know that everyday that passes is one day closer to the day we're finally together. So I'm trying to really live the last few months of my life as a "single", before Jr comes out and I'll have to devote my time to him already. LOL, and by "single" I mean doing things that I like at my own time, spending time with my family and friends, not having to check in with anybody; in no way do I mean living the single life, partying and hooking up with guys! I'm fully committed to Jr already, I think I have been ever since he wrote his first letter to me.
As crazy as this may sound, I knew he was someone special from the first letter I got from him. Something just clicked within me, and then over the next few months I just started falling deeper and deeper in love with him. To someone who hasn't been through something like this before, it is VERY hard to comprehend just how you know you can love and fall in love with someone just via mail. It's utterly absurd to the 21st century mind, that you can court via snail mail; people just don't believe it's possible. With instant communication technology available at our hands and couples being able to communicate with each other all the time and almost instantly, it's very hard for people to take a courtship where you hear from each other at best once a week, and at worst, fortnightly. It's just incomprehensible, and I don't blame them at all. But I'm just tired of having to deal with the negativity, the disbelief, the skepticism that is constantly being thrown my way. I know I have to stay strong but it's not as easy as it seems.
One of the worst things about this whole situation is the inability to come clean with my family, the inability to tell them all of what is happening to me. I grew up being very close to my family and they practically know almost everything about me. But now, having to hide what is perhaps the largest part of my being is slowly killing me. This is supposed to be a piece of happy news but the circumstances under which all this occurred has made it entirely impossible for me to tell my parents the truth and expect their understanding and blessings of us. Recent talks with my mother have only served to reaffirm my fears. Like any parents out there, mine just want the best for me. They want me to live the best life that can possibly come my way. And where marriage is concerned, they hope that I'll marry the best available catch out there. My mother's always told me and my sister: He doesn't have to be rich, but he must be hardworking and in a good professional job, and able to earn a good living to support the both of you. And because no one they know has ever deviated from this 'path', they cannot see me walking any other paths as well. They always joke about my wedding, what it'll be like; they talk about it like it's the same as most of my other cousins and relatives. They talk about bringing him back to Melaka to see my relatives and cousins. And inside I don't know to break it to them that there's a chance Jr may never be able to leave USA, and even if he can, it'll be only after 2017, when he gets off parole.
This blog is really getting to be all about Jr, huh? Haha, I can't help it, he consumes almost all my thoughts. I can only take all this one step at a time. I really have no clue what to do now, or how to proceed in all this, only time will tell. I just really ask for God's favor in all this.